Hotdog & Friends

Sager Bombs

I swear… anything we can do, these Oklahomans can do better. Taking our basketball team was terrible, but I always thought our state would be the kings of beastiality, thanks to the infamous Mr. Hands horse fucking death of a few years ago. By the way, that’s a link to a description of the crime, and it at the bottom it links to a video if you nasty. The video is not safe for work, life, belief in god, or wanting to stay sober.

Well, I guess Oklahomans do animal banging better than us too. Word out of Tulsa tells the tale of a boy who, while hanging out at home with his girlfriend, discovered over 250 videotapes and computer pictures of his mom boning three different dogs. Sweet fucking christ. I remember finding a box of condoms in my parents’ bedroom and that was traumatic enough… this guy found 193 CD-ROMs and DVDs, 67 VHS tapes, 12 cassette tapes, two floppy discs, two computer flash drives and one photo album showing the sex acts. So I guess he probably won’t be a contestant on “Yo Momma” anytime soon. Oh, and I suppose that might be a dealbreaker when it comes to the kid’s girlfriend, eh? Sorry, it’s not you… it’s your dogfucking family. Also, mom was in the hospital being treated for appendicitis. I wonder how her internals got messed up?

So, well played, Oklahoma. And remember, Seattleites, if any Okies want to remind you how superior they are in grabbing our hoops team, don’t forget to remind them that they are the kings of beasiality as well.

I wonder if it’s too late to change the team name from Thunder?

Fig Jam

For the Seattle Mariners it’s a lost season.  Everyone knows it.  They have the worst record in baseball and are last in a variety of offensive statistical categories.  They don’t hit and they don’t score runs.  So now the focus must be on the future.  Evaluating which players should remain on the roster for next season and which players should be moving on.  After having watched 18 innings of Mariner’s baseball in the past two days, I have come up with the following list of players that should return:

1.  Raul Ibanez

2.  Bryan LaHair

3.  Arthur Rhodes

(note: Felix didn’t pitch, but I will assume that if he had he would make the list at #4)

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