Hotdog & Friends

Fig Jam

For the Seattle Mariners it’s a lost season.  Everyone knows it.  They have the worst record in baseball and are last in a variety of offensive statistical categories.  They don’t hit and they don’t score runs.  So now the focus must be on the future.  Evaluating which players should remain on the roster for next season and which players should be moving on.  After having watched 18 innings of Mariner’s baseball in the past two days, I have come up with the following list of players that should return:

1.  Raul Ibanez

2.  Bryan LaHair

3.  Arthur Rhodes

(note: Felix didn’t pitch, but I will assume that if he had he would make the list at #4)

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Fig Jam

During every Mariners / Red Sox game that I have ever attended, the pseudo Boston masses have taken up the chant, “Let’s go Red Sox.”  It’ s a cutting edge, complex, and beautiful chant.  Lets go….. Red Sox.  For most Mariner fans sitting around this, it is just annoying.  It’s not offensive really, only tiresome.  We certainly aren’t going to take up the Mariner flag and start shouting back at the Red Sox fans.  Not until we get that written apology in the mail about that whole Sexson/Bavasi debacle.  Basically we are just counting down the seconds until it ends. 

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Constable Echelon

Long time voice of the Seattle Supersonics Kevin Calabro will be staying in the Pacific Northwest to lend his signature erratic, insouciant* baritone to the expansion Seattle Sounders FC of the MLS.

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Fig Jam

Dear Marion,

I regret to inform you that you are not a rich white guy, cronie, lifetime member of the NRA, or named “Scooter.”  Therefore, your request to be released from prison has been denied.  While the President found your reasons for disliking jail to be compelling (namely that it was “icky” and that your prison girlfriend may or may not be cheating on you with the bull in block 4D) he respects the American Justice system and reserves the right to abuse it only on special occasions, for his special friends.

Citing precedent from the Clinton era, Mr. Bush notes that his position is in no way contradictory to the accepted norms of Presidential immunity.  He further noted that Presidents rarely, if ever, take steps to help minorities get out of jail.  Being a woman doesn’t help either.

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Fig Jam

There is a small chance that Greg Norman’s performance in the 2008 British Open will come to be viewed as a sort of turning point in the game of golf.  I will concede that it is a longshot at best, but I am hopeful that officials at the USGA, the Royal and Ancient Golf Club, and other individuals who influence the direction of the game took notice of Norman’s remarkable run and understood it for what it truly was.

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Constable Echelon

The former Sonics appear to have settled on a new name. Dust bowl denizens, let’s hear it for your Oklahoma City Thunder! Do you think that sounds most like a WNBA team, an NBDL team, a minor league baseball team, or a select girls soccer team? PS If you thought we were rooting for “Bombers”, you were way out of line.

“I just feel so blessed to be drafted by Oklahoma City. Growing up I always wanted to be a…uh, Thunder.”

Report: Ex-Sonics will be “Thunder” (Seattle Times)

Add Nate Robinson courtesy of the Fanhouse via some blog called “Dead-spin”. Nothing says damning with faint praise like having your Summer League jersey retired.

Nate Robinson is a Summer League icon (Fanhouse)

Constable Echelon

Remember those Mike Krzyzewski American Express commercials that served primarily to promote Duke basketball to recruits? Plenty of ACC rivals and general Duke haters decried the ads as an unfair recruiting advantage given to a celebrity coach. Sunday night on the ESPYs UW received a similar side benefit when Ty Willingham was featured in the human interest piece on John Carlos and Tommie Smith’s fist raising protest from the 1968 Mexico City Olympics.

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Question to Spinnaface: What does the world look like from behind a spinna?

Answer: It’s like being dipped in awesome all the time.

I think I would have to agree.

Constable Echelon

In case you missed it, great article from Yahoo! (found via The Big Lead) about Ichiro’s annual expletive laden tirade against the National League, which David Ortiz credits with the AL’s continuing run of success.

Am I the only one who had no idea about this tradition that dates to Ichiro’s rookie year?

Ichiro’s speech to All-Stars revealed (Yahoo! Sports)

The Tao of Ichiro’s Obscene Language (The Big Lead)

(August in Kansas City is hotter than two rats f#$king in a wool sock.)

FIg Jam

Picking this year’s British Open should be a lot of fun.  The field is wide open and there are several intriguing storylines.  Here are 5 players who should be favorites, and 1 who should be removed from the tour.

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