Week 8 Pac-10 Hoops Preview

Constable Echelon

FSN is married to that court level angle that inevitably leads to the viewer missing game action. I call that fucker “The Regional Emmy” camera. “Oooh look at us! We’re shooting this game so unconVEN-tionally! Recognize our directorial choices!”

I try to look past the Dan Belluomini. I love Marques Johnson. I enjoy Lamar Hurd. But mostly I just have no other options. When it comes to Pac-10 hoops on tv we’re like the crowd at this concert.

If I like the games they’re in bold.

Cal @ Oregon

As detailed in Fig Jam’s wrap this week, it wasn’t even fun watching UW kick the ever loving shit out of Oregon last Saturday. Well, it was kind of fun. But they’re not trying. This is a collection of players and coaches that do not like each other. This will always be the problem with Oregon. When the going gets tough, everyone is just there for the big locker room. And the endless parade of new jerseys starts to look desperate rather than fresh or next level.

Stanford @ Oregon State

Stanford are 3.5 point favorites in Corvallis. I’m honestly surprised that Oregon State isn’t favored.

Washington State @ USC

These two teams combined for 90 points the first time around. So no, I won’t be watching this.

#19 Washington @ #15 UCLA

To me this one is all about tempo. If it stays slow UCLA is going to win. If UW can push things up a little bit, then Ben Howland – and via him his players – will get uncomfortable. For this purpose Romar must summon quicksilver irritant, Venoy Overton.

photo: seattletimes.com

Venoy can be a hard player for some people to watch. He plays 100mph all the time and you can’t tell if he’s in control or not. I think I have it figured out. Watching Venoy Overton is like being on mushrooms. You just have to roll with it. If you try to fight it you will make yourself crazy.

Washington State @ #15 UCLA

Stop me if I sound like a broken record, but UCLA only beat WSU by two points earlier this season. Why? Because Ben Howland likes it slow, even when it would overwhelmingly be to his advantage to push the pace against inferior athletes. Throw in a UW hangover and who knows, maybe something crazy happens.

Cal @ Oregon State

Friend of the program Lamar Hurd rightly pointed out after OSU shocked Cal in Haas earlier this season, that the Beavers were eager to show Jay John that they could play. If I was Jay John I wouldn’t exactly be looking forward to returning to Corvallis so soon. Maybe Montgomery can mercifully send him out recruiting on Saturday.

#19 Washington @ USC

Tricky game. If UW can manage a split this weekend I will be totally satisfied. USC has giant guards, and if Floyd manages to stay on the sidelines for this one he would be well served to employ the trapping defense that Oregon State used to stymie Washington’s diminutive back court.

Stanford @ Oregon

In my dreams Ernie Kent’s high top fade and Mike Bellotti’s mustache have opened up a hole in the wall detective agency in Eugene. The mustache has a drinking problem and the high top fade is a neat freak, but I’ll be damned if they don’t always get their man.

Robin Thicke Game of the Week

photo: freshnerd.com

Arizona @ #11 Arizona State
What’s good, girl. Robin Thicke at your service. Can I interest you in a panty removal?

Consider me very excited for this UA-ASU tilt. Arizona is going to want to turn this into a free flowing affair to let their stars shine. Arizona State wants to ugly it up and grind out a victory. It reminds me of the time I picked up a young comedienne named Monique back in the day. Going into the coat check room I was pretty confident my extensive lovemaking vocabulary would carry the day. But a part of me was concerned that she would just rip my dick off.

What happened? Well, it turned into a high intensity game of runs. In that we had both had a few too many chocolate-tinis. Tom Wolfe left that little soiree looking like Simon Dutton.