Sounders FC Notes: Greg Vanney is an Utter Travesty

I have to speak. Because Lord knows Greg Vanney cannot.

In a world of awful soccer announcing, Greg Vanney has taken the cake as the worst of them all. Sounders FC need to remove him from the television broadcasts with all haste, lest Kevin Calabro strangle him with his microphone cord.

A far cry from Marques Johnson (soccerbyives.net)

For those unfamiliar with Mr. Vanney, the 10-year MLS veteran retired last season and now pairs with Kevin Calabro as the color analyst for Seattle Sounders FC telecasts.

I just listened to him repeatedly refer to our star striker Fredy “Montoya” before the Chivas USA game. (It’s Montero — on any given night you can hear the ladies screaming.)

Other Notes:

Steve Zakuani needs to play.

Far and away, Sounders FC’s best player this season has been Osvaldo Alonso. Watch him; you’ll see why.

Freddie Ljungberg is slow. In a breakaway against Chivas USA, the Swede was caught and beaten off the ball by Jonathan Bornstein. The same Jonathan Bornstein who lost Ljungberg for Chivas’ first goal. Ljungberg is killing the team right now.

Opposing teams know Montero’s weaknesses. Specifically, he’s slow, uncommitted, and can lose focus. As long as opponents keep him from receiving balls at his feet, he can be taken out of the game.

The Sounders FC March to the Match. Know about it. Do it.   

Taylor Graham is the most important player you don’t know about. He keeps the team together.

Our free kicks and corner kicks are abysmal. Once they get this straightened out, you can expect a few more goals from their best aerial threat: Nate Jaqua.