The Sounders Starting XI, If They Were Automobiles

Vin Diesel drove a modified 1970 Charger

Kasey Keller: 1969 Dodge Charger. They just don’t make ‘em like they used to.

Leo Gonzalez: A really nice El Camino. Does a lot of things reasonably well, but can’t shake the feeling it will break down at any moment.

Jeff Parke: Ford F-150. Reliable, strong, tough, modest.

Jhon Kennedy Hurtado: Acura MDX. As strong as the F-150, but quicker off the line.

James Riley: A nod to James’ Korean heritage, a Hyundia Sonata. Nicer than you think, with a price tag much cheaper than a similar European model.

Steve Zakuani: BMW 3-Series. Fast, corners well, energetic, built for speed. I would say Jaguar because he’s English but those things are shit.

Osvaldo Alonso: Alfa Romeo. Tough to get your hands on one, but when you find one you hold onto it.

Hi Detroit. Maybe you should do something else next time.

Brad Evans: Any Pontiac. Looks great when it’s working, but spends a lot of time in the shop.

Alvaro Fernandez: Chrysler 200. Came in with a lot of hype by maaaaaybe not quite as good as advertised

Fredy Montero: Ferrari. Listen to it purrrrrr.

Blaise Nkufo O’Brian White: Jeep Cherokee. Strong and reliable but will have several owners before it goes to the scrapyard.